


We Have Run Away

by xDinahQueenx



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alcoholism, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-22
Updated: 2013-11-22
Packaged: 2018-01-02 08:24:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1054617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xDinahQueenx/pseuds/xDinahQueenx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>No, not the stunned look, it was the moment after. The <b>pity</b>. </em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Have Run Away

It was becoming rather ill-advised for her to have come out here with the team. Quite frankly, one of her rasher, more questionable decisions. Erin had been working towards mending the relationship she'd broken so many years ago with Alex; which had culminated tonight in Alex inviting her into the hotel room. They'd shared room service hamburgers and fairly decent conversation though nothing entirely _deep_.   
  
But Erin had wanted, maybe, to recapture some of that feeling from before. She shouldn't have kissed her, probably. The stunned look had been enough to tell her what she needed to know. No, not the stunned look, it was the moment after. The _pity_.   
  
She knew she shouldn't be doing this, either. Erin had been doing well. For all her will, however, there was only so much she could take. _Pity_. That on the heels of everything with _Dave_ ; it had been too much. She was ruining herself again, in a BAU paid for hotel, sitting at the bar with manicured fingernails tapping against the cut glass. She hadn't drank it yet, but she didn't think she was going to remain strong enough to resist for long.   
  
She wanted to resist, of course. But what other solace did she have, now? Everything had fallen apart in the last few years. She kept messing up. Erin knew, professionally, she was still on task, but her personal life was becoming a jumble of missed chances and botched opportunities and deep regret.  
  
Erin felt the presence next to her, recognized the smell of _Jovan Musk_ and didn't look up from the amber liquid and the ice in the cup in front of her. Didn't stop the tapping. Didn't acknowledge the presence. Even when Alex cleared her throat and nudged her foot against Erin's ankle deliberately.   
  
"Erin, we need to discuss this," Alex said. Her tone was neutral, which was a typical sort of thing. She knew, of course, the depth of emotion that Alex could have. Erin had weathered her moods—anger and joy and sorrow. But ever since _then_ , the biggest mistake she'd probably made, Alex had always guarded her tone.   
  
Erin regretted a lot of things.    
  
But that was the past and what was done was done.   
  
"No, we really do not," Erin countered. For a moment, for a tiny moment, Erin thought that perhaps she could do this and everything would be fine. She'd just have one. Just to take the edge off. Alex's hand cupped the top of the glass.   
  
"I'm not letting that happen again, Erin," Alex's tone was sterner, this time. Of course, she'd probably heard. _Morgan's confrontation_ and Aaron, too.   
  
She didn't want to need Alex, she wanted to be strong on her own— _had been_ strong on her own. She looked down at Alex's hands, slim fingers and the gleam of her wedding ring in the low light of the bar.   
  
In this moment, she wasn't sure if Alex was talking about the drinking or the kiss. Either way, Erin decided, she was done. She stood from the barstool and paid for the drink she didn't have. Erin didn't turn around, didn't thank Alex, simply said over her shoulder.   
  
"I need some air."   
  
Alex didn't follow.   
  
Erin couldn't say she was surprised. (Or glad.)   
  
There was another bar not too far down the street. And there she could drink in peace.  


End file.
